Sober Journal
-
Can’t Raise a Toast.. So I’ll Raise a Hallelujah!
He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. – Psalm 40:2 I don’t think I’ll ever forget what my life was like before Jesus reached down and pulled me out of that dark and… Continue reading
-
An Ode to Coffee
If coffee had been around 3500 years ago, I’m convinced Moses would’ve been the first in line at Starbucks. Forget waiting on the manna – he’d be waiting for his grande dark roast with two shots of espresso. And the Israelites might’ve made it to the Promised Land in three days instead of wandering for… Continue reading
-
America Unites for a Pampered Rodent
“The future is something everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.” – C. S. Lewis Every year on February 2nd, in a tiny Pennsylvania village, a glorified furball named Punxsutawney Phil emerges from his lavish accommodations to predict the weather. The country waits with bated breath… Continue reading
-
“My Name is Scott, and I’m….”
For I am not ashamed of the gospel, because it is the power of God that brings salvation to everyone who believes: first to the Jew, then to the Gentile.– Romans 1:16 As a recovering alcoholic, I’ve been actively involved in a 12-Step recovery program for several years now. This program has been an incredible… Continue reading
-
Desperate Faith to Deliberate Faith
The royal official said, “Sir, come down before my child dies.” “Go,” Jesus replied, “your son will live.” The man took Jesus at his word and departed.– John 4:49-50 “God, if you’ll do this for me, I promise that I’ll (fill in the blank).” Sound familiar? It does for me. Before I came to saving… Continue reading
-
He’s Still Performing Miracles Today
Jesus asked, “Didn’t I heal ten men? Where are the other nine? Has no one returned to give glory to God except this foreigner?” And Jesus said to the man, “Stand up and go. Your faith has healed you.” – Luke 17: 17-18 If you’re like me, reading Luke’s account of Jesus healing the ten… Continue reading
-
Our Addictions Hurt Others
“Pick me up and throw me into the see,” Jonah replied, “and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon you.” One of the most selfish things you will ever hear an alcoholic or an addict say is, “My drinking (or using) affects only me.”… Continue reading
-
Getting Better Requires a Change of Diet
They make a lot of recovery meetings. They may even sign up to make coffee for the group or greet members at the door once in a while. And some of them may abstain from drinking for several months, perhaps even a few years. But they still have the same problems that they had when… Continue reading
-
Arrivederci!
And [Jesus] said to them, “Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.” For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat. And they went away in the boat to a desolate place by themselves.– Mark 6: 31-32 Well… after several years of not having a… Continue reading
-
The Most Valuable Thing Seldom Measured
“Try to imagine a life without timekeeping. You probably can’t. You know the month, the year, the day of the week. There is a clock on your wall or the dashboard of your car. You have a schedule, a calendar, a time for dinner or a movie. Yet all around you, timekeeping is ignored. Birds… Continue reading
-
Just Breathe.
Life’s not the breath you take, the breathing in and outThat gets you through the day, ain’t what it’s all aboutYou just might miss the point, trying to win the raceLife’s not the breath you take,But the moments that take your breath away.– George Strait Growing up, I lived in a rural coal mining community… Continue reading
-
A Man on the Run
The sea was getting rougher and rougher. So they asked Jonah, “What should we do to you to make the sea calm down for us?” He replied, “Pick me up and throw me into the sea and it will become calm. I know that it is my fault that this great storm has come upon… Continue reading
-
A Ghost From the Past
I recently ran into an old golf buddy I hadn’t seen for several years. We shared some fun times together on the golf course for the better part of a decade. Alcohol was most always involved and very much a huge part of that lifestyle for me. But once I got sober and began following… Continue reading
-
Where Have All the Good Samaritans Gone?
“But a Samaritan, as he traveled, came where the man was; and when he saw him, he took pity on him. He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, brought him to an inn, and took care of him.” – Luke… Continue reading
-
The Day After: Reflections on Greatest Yorkie That Ever Lived
“How lucky am I to have something that makes saying goodbye so hard.”– Winnie the Pooh It is truly incredible to possess such a profound connection with someone or something that the mere thought of bidding farewell becomes an arduous task. The emotions that arise, a mixture of gratitude, appreciation, and reluctance, are a testament… Continue reading
-
Grace isn’t for those who deserve it. (Thank God)
“Rules don’t change anyone’s heart, ever. Grace does.” – Brant Hansen Tired. Restless. Miserable. Upon entering the rooms of Alcoholics Anonymous, this is the unenvious state that most of us were in. We thought we could find respite through escaping the realities of life through a bottle. But as some of us eventually learn, the… Continue reading
-
Living in the Shadow of Unkept Promises
[Jonathan said] “May the Lord be with you as he used to be with my father. And may you treat me with the unfailing love of the Lord as long as I live. But if I die, treat my family with this faithful love, even when the Lord destroys all your enemies from the face… Continue reading
-
Admitted to God, Ourselves, and Another Human Being
“Confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results. – James 5:16 (NLT) There is nothing easy about the 5th Step in Alcoholics Anonymous. But if we wish to remain sober, we know… Continue reading
-
Becoming Authentic While Living a Sober Life
“To thine own self be true.” – Shakespeare On the back of every sober coin are the words, “To thine own self be true.” It is a phrase that has been around for centuries, with origins in Renaissance literature, and the idea behind it is just as relevant today as it ever was. In essence,… Continue reading
-
Loose Change
He was always there. Day after day, this young fella would be standing at this intersection on a road where I travel daily. He always wore the same clothes, which looked like they hadn’t been washed in years. His shoes had no laces and were basically held together by a few strands of worn duct… Continue reading
-
Defining Moments
“But then I recall all you have done, O Lord; I remember your wonderful deeds of long ago. They are constantly in my thoughts. I cannot stop thinking about your mighty works. – Psalm 77: 11-12 My hands were shaking, and I instinctively backed away. “You can do this,” I said under my breath. “You’ve… Continue reading
-
Sometimes You Gotta Hug the Cactus
“Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” – 1 Corinthians 13:7 Alcohol brought me peace and freedom early on. But near the end I found myself thinking not of joy on a daily basis, but of death. A life that had once promised me more than I… Continue reading
-
Living in Yesterday’s Light
I got up early this morning and watched the sun rising over the mountains. This is much too early, I thought to myself. I yawned and asked myself why I decided to get up so soon. Surely daylight would appear without my presence, like it has all the other times before? But it had been… Continue reading
-
The Alcoholic’s Eden
Regardless of how much time in sobriety one has, every recovering alcoholic hears two voices. The voice of reason says: You are at liberty to drink whatever you want, but you must not drink alcohol. For if you drink it, you know what awaits. Trouble, followed by more trouble, surely followed by an alcoholic death.… Continue reading
-
Not All Break-Ups Are Bad
“Resentment is the number one offender. It destroys more alcoholics than anything else.” ~ Alcoholics Anonymous, p.64 My first sponsor seemed to be a fun-loving guy, who surrounded himself with several other fun-loving guys. He chaired one of the meetings I attended early on in my recovery, and he’d recently celebrated a dozen or so… Continue reading
-
We Will Not Regret the Past
Promise: a declaration or assurance that one will do a particular thing or a particular thing will happen. There are 12 Steps in Alcoholics Anonymous. One who wants to get and stay sober in AA isn’t under any obligation whatsoever to work the AA program. There are no requirements, there are no musts in AA.… Continue reading
-
The Parable of The Rich Young Lady
” A rich young woman sat beside a poor elderly man on a plane. She abruptly alerted the flight attendant upon taking her seat, “Please, find me another seat immediately.” The flight attendant answered warmly, “I’m sorry Ma’am, but the economy cabin is fully booked.” The rich woman replied, “But I’m not going to travel… Continue reading
-
Pain Management
As a sober, recovering alcoholic, I have found incredible value in going back in my life and recalling the day that my life hit bottom. I was all but dead. I had just lost my father; I had lost all but a remnant of my sanity; and I was on the verge of losing every… Continue reading
-
Better Than I Deserve
“How blessed is the man who made the Lord his trust.” ~ Psalm 40:4 One fall afternoon I was parked on the shoulder of a rural highway about 50 miles southwest of Ashland, Kentucky. As I sat there completely hopeless and numb, I considered what few options remained. Roughly 9 hours earlier I had been… Continue reading
-
But For the Grace of God
“Our very lives, as ex-problem drinkers, depend upon our constant thought of others and how we may help meet their needs.” ~ Alcoholics Anonymous p.20 It was getting late in the evening and all I wanted was a few minutes of personal time to enjoy my favorite tv program. The day had been busy, but… Continue reading
-
What Does God See?
“God sees us as we are, loves us as we are, and accepts us as we are. But by His grace, He doesn’t leave us as we are.” ~ Tim Keller I had suspected something was going on for a while. I kept trying to convince myself that maybe I was just imagining things; that… Continue reading
-
Encouraging Words in Difficult Times
“For I am the Lord your God who takes hold of your right hand and says to you, Do not fear; I will help you.” ~ Isaiah 41:13 My life was in shambles. Every single day for the past several years, I sat alone in my house and sought my escape through a bottle that… Continue reading
-
Name Your Price
“Buy the truth and do not sell it – wisdom, instruction and insight as well.” ~ Proverbs 23:23 “Where did you hear that?” I was asked this question the other day as I was discussing something I saw on the news with another person. After I told them, they replied, “Oh. Well that makes sense… Continue reading
-
A Double Life Leads to Death
“The integrity of the upright guides them, but the unfaithful are destroyed by their duplicity.” ~ Proverbs 11:3 “He was a quiet guy, but he always seemed friendly when we would see him out.” This is such a common description we hear by the neighbors of someone who has committed a heinous crime. He seemed… Continue reading
-
Gracefully Unforgettable
“I, even I, am he who blots out your transgressions, for my own sake, and remembers your sins no more.” ~ Isaiah 43:25 I was at a recovery meeting years ago, and the guest speaker that evening wasn’t aware that he only had 30 minutes to narrate his personal story of recovery from alcoholism. I… Continue reading
-
As We Understood Him
“Not being able to fully understand God is frustrating, but it is ridiculous for us to think we have the right to limit God to something we are capable of comprehending.” ~ Francis Chan Most of us enter into the rooms of recovery in our weakest, most desperate moment. It is there where we begin… Continue reading
-
Keeping Promises
Not long after I returned home from rehab, my wife said to me one evening, “We need to talk.” Now I don’t know about you, but anytime someone says this to me – the panic button automatically gets pushed. My mind begins to race with the worst-case scenarios playing out and my heart pounds in… Continue reading
-
Prayer Becomes Our Lifeline
“Those of us who have come to make regular use of prayer would no more do without it than we would refuse air, food, or sunshine. And for the same reason. When we refuse air, light, or food, the body suffers. And when we turn away from meditation and prayer, we deprive our minds, our… Continue reading
-
Alcohol Won
The obsession to drink left me a while ago. But just because I no longer have the constant urge doesn’t mean I never have a fleeting thought about how nice it would be to have a cocktail or two to take the edge off. This doesn’t mean that I can no longer trust God, nor… Continue reading
-
Dealing with the Past
“If you are bringing your gift to the altar, and there remember that your brother or sister has anything against you, go first and be reconciled to him or her, and then come back and present your gift.” ~ Matthew 5:23-24 Repairing broken relationships can be incredibly challenging sometimes. Very few know this better than… Continue reading
-
Avoiding that First Drink
The idea that somehow, someday he will control and enjoy his drinking is the great obsession of every abnormal drinker. The persistence of this illusion is astonishing. Many pursue it into the gates of insanity or death. We learned that we had to fully concede to our innermost selves that we were alcoholics. This is… Continue reading
-
Christmas with a Stranger
“From there we set sail and arrived at Rhegium. The next day the south wind came up, and on the following day we reached Puteoli. There we found some brothers and sisters who invited us to spend a week with them. And so we came to Rome. The brothers and sisters there had heard that… Continue reading
-
A Selfless Program for Selfish People
The very first step in Alcoholics Anonymous is the only step I can work perfectly, without blemish. Each morning that I wake up and go through my daily reading, prayer and meditation, I’m making the greatest investment possible toward my sobriety. This time affords me the ability to get honest with myself and God, and… Continue reading
-
From something to Someone
There is only one key, and it is called Willingness. Once unlocked by willingness, the door opens almost of itself, and looking through it, we shall see a pathway beside which is an inscription. It reads: “This is the way to a faith that works.” ~ AA, 12 Steps and 12 Traditions p.34 Step Three… Continue reading
-
The Greatest Window of Opportunity
“Helping others is the foundation stone of your recovery. A kindly act once in a while isn’t enough. You have to act the Good Samaritan every day, if need be.” ~ Page 97, Alcoholics Anonymous When I share my recovery story with someone who genuinely wants to get sober, I’m effectively opening a window of… Continue reading
-
Don’t Squander Your Mulligan!
“Every good gift and every perfect gift is from above, and comes down from the Father of lights.” ~ James 1:17 It’s been quite a while (for me at least) since I had my last drink, and I’ve been required to deal with a lot of life challenges during this time. Since my last drink…… Continue reading
-
Keeping it Simple
“Forever is a mighty long time.” That was my thought early on in sobriety. That day when I finally decided that I’d had enough – that I no longer wanted to continue living the way I had been living – I wasn’t even remotely in a place emotionally to think long-term. To be even more… Continue reading
-
Thank You
“Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” ~ John 15:13 I remember the first day I reported for duty. I was only 18 years old, and had no idea what awaited me. Although the upcoming 4 months would be the most challenging in my young adult life,… Continue reading
-
It’s a Free Ride, When You’ve Already Paid
“You know, you can be a real ass sometimes, Scott.” True statement. Despite being sober for a while now, I can still cop an attitude on occasion. And when that happens, invariably it’s because I didn’t get my way with something, and it’s usually something insignificant in the grand scheme of things. Ever notice that… Continue reading
-
From Discovery to Recovery
As we start our new journey in sobriety, we begin to recover physically and emotionally. But this will only prove to be temporary if we remain stubborn to find a meaningful spirituality. For some of us who’ve never truly embraced the concept of a Living God, this will seem incredibly difficult. For those who’ve wandered… Continue reading
-
One Man’s Apple is Another Man’s Grape
“Then the man and his wife heard the sound of the Lord God as he was walking in the garden in the cool of the day, and they hid from the Lord God among the trees of the garden. But the Lord God called to the man, “Where are you?” ~ Genesis 3: 8-9 Nothing… Continue reading
-
Nothing to Lose
I was tired. I was broken. I was without hope. I don’t recall exactly when alcohol stopped doing everything I needed it to do. What I do know however is that my life was circling the drain. I hated what I had become, what alcohol had turned me into. And for what? It wasn’t like… Continue reading
About Me
Welcome! I’m Scott (aka Former Blackout Artist), and I’m so happy you decided to drop in! I hope you find the content here spiritually enlightening and uplifting. Most of all, I hope that my love of Christ is revealed through my writing and that it encourages you in some way today. Thanks for stopping by!
