Former Blackout Artist

A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.
– Proverbs 15:1

There’s perhaps no clearer mark of true Christian maturity than controlling the tongue. Many can speak boldly, many can master a room. But few can speak gently and with self-control.

Let us consider our Lord Jesus Christ.

He was despised, yet He did not despise in return. He was slandered by the Pharisees, abandoned by His friends, rejected by His own people, betrayed by Judas, and condemned by truly wicked men. Yet never once do we find a sinful word escaping our Savior’s lips. He stood before Pilate and Herod, received the fists of Roman soldiers, and stood beneath the shadow of the cross. And not even once did He give over to anger.

What astonishing self-control! What holy restraint! The Son of God possessed all power, yet He answered with patience. He could’ve summoned angels! But He chose gentleness.

We’re forced to confess that this standard exposes every last one of us. How quickly do we justify sharp words because of wounded pride or an angry temper? How often do we excuse ourselves because we were misunderstood, or maybe even provoked. Yet our Lord endured infinitely greater wrongs without sinning.

How often does a harsh word end a quarrel? Never! It only feeds it. Pride is quick to speak loudly and bitterly. But grace, loved ones…. Grace speaks carefully. The wise Christian understands that being right is not always the highest victory. Peace is purchased only through the currency of humility.

The apostle Paul commands us in Romans 12 to live at peace with everyone “as far as it depends on you.” That means the believer must often absorb an offense rather than return one. It means saying, “I was wrong.” It means answering softly when the flesh longs to strike back.

Especially in the home, a gentle answer may prevent wounds that linger for years. Many men imagine that strength is found in winning arguments. But Scripture teaches that true strength is found in ruling one’s spirit.

Gentle words are evidence that Christ is ruling the heart. They are anything but weakness.