“The future is something everyone reaches at the rate of sixty minutes an hour, whatever he does, whoever he is.” – C. S. Lewis
Every year on February 2nd, in a tiny Pennsylvania village, a glorified furball named Punxsutawney Phil emerges from his lavish accommodations to predict the weather. The country waits with bated breath – will he see his shadow and curse us with six more weeks of winter, or will he grant us an early spring?
But’s let’s be honest… Phil’s accuracy record is, at best, mediocre. About 35% of the time he gets it right, which means he’s about as reliable as our local weatherman. (No offense, Matt Broderick from channel 69, but we both know you’re guessing just like Phil except you have better graphics.) If we used Phil’s method in real life – seeing our shadow and deciding to stay inside – we’d never leave the house in the summer, and we’d never go to work on cloudy days. Actually, that second part doesn’t sound that bad…
But Groundhog Day isn’t really about weather. No, it’s about something much bigger. It’s the one extremely rare day each year when we Republicans and Democrats both seem to want the same thing! – warmer weather. We stand side by side, in the freezing cold no less, united in our foolish reverence for a well-fed, deeply spoiled rodent. While we can’t seem to agree on a budget, a border policy, or whether men should be permitted to use women’s restrooms, we have no problem showing up at the crack of dawn to watch a groundhog live out his best life.
And Phil does have a great life. He gets chauffeured around like a celebrity, eats a carefully curated diet, has a team of medical staff looking after him, and his PR team catering to his every need. This glorified rat lives better than millions of Americans, and yet no one seems to mind. Maybe it’s because, deep down, we all recognize that if anyone should get to enjoy a stress-free existence, it’s a guy whose entire job is to be hoisted into the air by a man in a top hat while half-asleep.
So whether Phil sees his shadow or not, one thing is certain: February 2nd is a day of hope. Not because we’ll find out if winter is ending, but because, for a brief moment, we all come together – Republicans, Democrats, and weather skeptics alike – to celebrate the strange, unexplainable joy of trusting a rodent over the experts.
And honestly, given the track records of both, who could blame us!
Former Blackout Artist 