“Forever is a mighty long time.” That was my thought early on in sobriety.
That day when I finally decided that I’d had enough – that I no longer wanted to continue living the way I had been living – I wasn’t even remotely in a place emotionally to think long-term. To be even more candid, I didn’t have the slightest inkling of just how far down into the abyss my life had fallen all those years. It would take a while before I began to better understand the extent of the damage that alcoholism had inflicted on my mental and spiritual wellbeing, not to mention the harm that had been done to many of the relationships in my life. So when I began my recovery, my only hope at that time was that perhaps I could take an extended break from drinking and reverse the uncontrollable death-spiral that I was in.
Interestingly enough, my mindset hasn’t changed all this time since.
Early sobriety sucks, there’s just no getting around it. A lot of alcoholics come into recovery because they have no other recourse. Many come in jobless, penniless, and even homeless. Sometimes they come in with a slew of legal consequences chasing them every step of the way. This mountain of looming problems can make staying sober for any reasonable length of time seem impossible.
But before we can begin the first step in recovery – “admitting that we are powerless over alcohol, that our lives have become unmanageable” – we must begin with Step Zero: this crap has to stop!
Just for today: I can move a muscle and change a thought.
Just for today: I can reach out to another recovering alcoholic for support and encouragement.
Just for today: I can make a meeting to hear how others, like me, have managed to live life on life’s terms without drinking.
Just for today: I can pray and ask God to help me in this journey.
Just for today: I can avoid picking up a drink.
I don’t think about tomorrow. Tomorrow will be here soon enough. I’m focused on today. What can I do today to help my recovery? What lengths am I unwilling to go to avoid going back to a life of unmanageability and desperation?
Just for today, I have the ability to move away from the problem and move toward the solution.
One crisis at a time, one thought at a time, one day at a time, I can do this with God’s help.
Former Blackout Artist 