“Get rid of all bitterness, rage and anger, brawling and slander, along with every other form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” ~ Ephesians 4: 31-32
As I was in the depths of my active alcoholism, my entire perspective was both selfish and warped. Was my life full of bitterness? Indeed it was. My bouts of rage and anger kept family members and friends at a distance, and even during those rare moments they would come around, they walked on eggshells. Kindness had long since been replaced with bitterness, neglect, and indifference.
But there was a solution.
Early on in my recovery, I was encouraged to reestablish a connection with God, by those who had already found the solution for themselves. “That’s where we had to start, Scott. We had to find God again, reconcile our relationship with Him, and then acknowledge that He is the only true source that can help us stay sober.”
Yet, that was only the beginning.
Getting rid of all the bitterness and anger in my life wasn’t easy, and is still, years later, an ongoing process. But as I got to work on the 12 Steps of AA with my sponsor, I began realizing that my attitude and outlook upon life had to change. If I were to stay sober and someday find a peaceful, productive existence again, I had to get my heart right with God, first.
Two books have completely changed my life: the Holy Bible, and the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous. The Big Book, for me, became the vehicle that ultimately led me back to the Biggest Book – the Holy Bible – later on in life. I may not read the Big Book every day these days, but I do read my Bible every morning, then pray and meditate on His word. This 20-minute discipline every morning has radically changed my life, and as a result has improved every relationship I have.
Recovery is a spiritual journey, one that leads to peace, healing, and contentment. Without God’s presence and help, the bitterness, anger, and self-seeking motives will surely reappear.
Who in their right mind would want to get sober only to remain miserable in life?!
Former Blackout Artist 